April 13, 2012 at 12:45 AM 2 comments

Some days the choice is crystal clear: Go left, and do wrong. Go right, and do right. It’s just that simple.

Other days the line is considerably blurrier: Whichever direction we choose, it seems the world will still come crashing down around our heads.

That’s the kind of week I had: The not-so-simple-fork-in-the-road.

My week started out challenging, but soon got upgraded to an all-out crisis. Suddenly a trip with my husband, which included some comedy events and a side trip to celebrate our anniversary, was threatened by a trifecta of ailments that hit me a couple of days prior to leaving town. So at the last minute, in addition to packing and preparing for my part in the events, I found myself laboring over whether or not I could make the trip at all.

A giant fork had landed in the middle of my road.

I’d like to say I took it well. But I didn’t. Having dealt with chronic illness for the better part of the past year and painstakingly working my way back to health, I was devastated to be struggling with the same old symptoms again. Seriously??? I couldn’t believe it. Surely this was some kind of cosmic joke, and God was going to pop out from behind a tree at any moment saying, “Just kidding!”  But He never did. Not only that, but my symptoms seemed to worsen as our departure date approached.

Any minute I’d have to decide whether to go or stay. Either choice was risky: if I went, I risked being miserable the whole time, or being too sick to participate once we got there. If I stayed behind, I risked missing out on everything we had planned, and regretting not having gone.

I hate choices like that, don’t you? I mean, WIN-WIN is one thing, but LOSE-LOSE???

So many thoughts kept echoing through my head. All the way from: You’d be crazy to go, feeling like you do. Remember the last time you tried that? To: If you really had faith, you’d just GO…and trust God to give you the strength. Yet the bouncing ball never quite seemed to land on either answer.

Even prayer didn’t seem to help. One minute God seemed to be saying one thing, the next minute another. I was bumfuzzled. Finally, in desperation I shot up one last prayer. As best I could, I heard His voice and made a choice. Then I sat with it for a moment…and listened. Hmm, what was that? Oh yes, I recognized it:  P e a c e.

And so I chose.

I was pretty sure that neither option would be easy to live with, humanly speaking. But the peace I felt gave me the courage to choose. And it continues to  sustain me through the ups and downs of living out the answer, even though my brain is still not 100% sure what the right choice was.

Are there any choices you’re having a hard time with this week?

I suspect that God isn’t nearly so concerned with whether we make “the perfect choice” as that we consult Him on it with sincerity of heart. He knows we’re working with faulty antennas, and that sometimes we have a hard time hearing His voice. He also knows that, for fear of putting words in His mouth, we’re sometimes reluctant to even try hearing His voice at all.

This week I learned that making the perfect choice wasn’t nearly as critical as I thought it was. After all, God’s still God, and I’m still His girl. And I trust that if I’m listening for the lessons He’s teaching in this situation, I’ll be that much more ready for the next one, whenever it comes along.

So no more second-guessing which choice I should’ve made. Mercifully, I’m finally ready to “stick a fork in it” and call it done…and move on to whatever adventure awaits me along this fork in the road.


Entry filed under: Friday Reflections. Tags: , , , , , , , .


2 Comments Add your own

  • 1. Mary Yerkes  |  April 13, 2012 at 2:15 AM

    Good word, Kim. I needed to hear this.


    • 2. Kimosphere  |  April 13, 2012 at 8:54 AM

      Mary, I am humbled and touched that today’s post was what you needed to hear. God wastes nothing…even our pain!



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Writer... speaker..."growing edge" seeker


Each new day offers a fresh opportunity to learn or languish, stagnate or grow. Like all sincere Christians, I face the ongoing challenge of finding THE GROWING EDGE.


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1. LISTEN without interrupting
(Proverbs 1:8)

2. SPEAK without accusing
(James 1:19)

3. GIVE without sparing
(Proverbs 21:26)

4. PRAY without ceasing
(Colossians 1:9)

5. ANSWER without arguing
(Proverbs 17:1)

6. SHARE without pretending
(Ephesians 4:15)

7. ENJOY without complaint
(Philippians 2:14)

8. TRUST without wavering
(I Corinthians 13:7)

9. FORGIVE without punishing
(Colossians 3:13)

10. PROMISE without forgetting
(Proverbs 13:12)

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